Bake Sales

I joke about how the one thing that made us hesitate joining Emmaus were the bake sales. I laid awake at night just thinking about that monthly commitment and could I be a nice little church mommy and comply with all the rules. My husband tried to talk sense into me that it was only a bake sale (just kidding) and then I bit the bullet and we joined. I knew that I was committed to bake sales for at least another 18 years. Wow. So I am mulling over what to make this month. Nothing too sweet and what sort of bread or tame cookie could I make? Bagels? Can I make those? Pretzels? LaRena was going to attempt that (you are not committed LaRena). Sigh. I think I will just start and see what happens. My own children rarely experience baking in the cookie department so I suppose this forces me to make them.

When Erik was around two he cut himself and we were at a friend's home to decide if he needed stitches and the mom gave him this lovely sugar cookie with icing. He didn't eat it. He just sat there and stared at it as if he had never seen anything so amazing as that cookie. We finally convinced him to try a bite. The guilt.......

So.....I am just sort of kidding about not joining Emmaus over bake sales but they honestly are a challenge for me. Hope somebody likes pumpkin muffins.......

Braces for Matthew

So it is Matthew's turn with the braces. Anna just got released from retainer wearing and Matthew is on the brink of getting the braces. They are of the variety you turn a key every night. Sounds painful. Should I cackle and tell him to come here my son? He seems pretty excited actually. I am SOOO glad I never needed braces. I can live with overbite and straight teeth. My dentist growing up would go on and on about how remarkably straight and trouble free my teeth were. Those were the days. I think I have some sort of tooth issue for every kid I've had. Maybe not quite that often but close enough. My dinner plan was foiled so better scoot.

Money flying out the window......Charley said he didn't even want to know the bill......

Mantras

So I have been on a rant with my kids about simply saying "Yes, Mom" or "Sorry Mom". It is a seemingly constant attempt by the children to try to blame things on other people and not just owe up to it. "Fabio, have you collected the eggs?" asks the mom. "Well, I was distracted by the two small children who came by with transformers so I forgot." instead of....."No mom, sorry mom". Ugh. Anyway, I keep stopping them in their in their tracks and asking them "What are you to say Fabio?" "Oh, no mom I didn't, sorry mom".

Excuses, excuses. It is paying off some. I am sort of tired of being their brains. Can you tell? It is better so I shouldn't complain too much but the consistancy on the part of the mom can be sort of painful. The brain power to remember 'the plan' of what needs to be done to train these kids is pretty exhausting as well. I am sure that is the same reason the husband comes home after using his brain all day in his most intense manner that leaves him tired and cranky.

Another friend stated that we are basically short tempered at times. We just think we are the only ones. Sigh. Doesn't make it right but getting through each day is a challenge for everyone. Oh there I go again attempting to say something deep. It is just my mind rambling.

Rules and repeating them do seem to lead to more peace and harmony in the school department though. I have been starting each class having the kids tell me the rules. I have been having the kids tell me the rules about everything lately so THEIR brains are working. So maybe their brains are a little more engaged and I can try to transfer a little of the tiredness onto them.....how sweet.

Playing video games

So.....I don't think I really need to play video games as driving around town is a live action game. There are pot holes to dodge everywhere you look so......it is like playing a video game I think except you have to hit some of them to avoid hitting another car. Wow. Tax dollars at work. Driving at night in the fog is especially entertaining. My dh assures me that the cars will weather the storm. Ok.......

Other news......no jealousy allowed please. We decided about a month ago to get Anna her graduation gift a year early. We bought her a nice sewing machine. She is very pleased and the plus side will also be that difficult projects now got a lot easier. I am sorry she won't be stopping by to use other people's sewing machines to put in zippers anymore. That is the down side for everyone else. The owner of the shop studied what she is interested in studying so I am sure they will have some great bonding time. I am excited for her. She doesn't graduate for another year but I would like her to get use of this machine now to prepare for the future. Even if she changes her mind about area of study she will still be able to get a lot of use out of this machine.

I had some energy today despite Stefan screaming until about 4:00 this afternoon. He is cutting his molars and was inconsolable. Children's motrin and ambosol didn't seem to help so he was also not eating. Ugh. A hungry baby is a grumpy baby.

Oh.....while driving to Barnes and Noble after picking up Anna from work I was totally mystified by the traffic. Why was everyone out shopping?????? Anna figured it out. Valentines Day is coming. We started down a road and there was no turning back to get out of the traffic. The bookstore was crammed with people. I don't do Valentines Day so I was pretty amazed by the turn out.

A few years ago Anna and I were at Martin's grocery and were mystified by the stream of dad's and small children streaming in the store at 5:00. Why were they there??? Then it dawned on us.....Valentines day and procrastinating dad's with little kids. We were thinking it might be entertaining to go back to Martin's this year to watch the parade of dad's with bouquets coming out of the store at the last minute. Balloons, teddy bears with flowers, chocolates.....it was sort of cute and amusing. We just don't do that holiday. We are lucky to do birthdays for adults around here. I guess that is sort of a bad habit but there are a lot of birthdays around here.

Sleep

I am just sleep greedy I think. We had a great pattern set up where Stefan was sleeping till 7:00 with no waking up in between. Well, 5:30am seems to be the rule at the moment. Sigh. Sure he is cute but I SOOO want to stay in bed. Yea, yea, this won't get an better any time soon. No comment from the peanut galleries.

The older kids are going to see Romeo and Juliet today. I will be riding herd on the little people here. I wonder where Charley keeps the duct tape.......just kidding. Maybe a movie they haven't seen in awhile will help for a little while. I want the older kids to go so it will be worth the effort.

Lies Homeschoolers tell or don't

I was talking to a friend yesterday and we were lamenting our lack of patience with our kids at times. How we can't remember to always say things cutely to our children with that sweet little tone that just motivate them to obey etc. Yes, we lament that and we are sorry for our lack of patience. I actually am the one who had sort of a trying morning in the patience department on our way to "The imposition of ashes". How bittersweet to go to a service of coperate confession and absolution and at the same time not be able to keep my cool. Ugh.

So this conversation continued in the evening. The mom was feeling very down about this topic and yes, I can feel that way as well. But it occurred to me the question of "what have we been told by the homeschooling community?" We have been told by the funde crowd as we have read homeschooling books, spent time in 'support' groups and worked in co-op situations that we are to be these perfect little mommies and perfect little teachers who never make any mistakes. These fictional mommies, do not talk about their weaknesses or even admit that they have them. Sin is not talked about because it must not occur. If sin is talked about, it is in the context of "well, honey if you had just done things this way, you wouldn't have these problems". There is no mention of Jesus's love and forgiveness for us. The try harder mentality leaves many a mom despairing and giving up. Weakness seems never to be admitted. I remember feeling down amoung these groups and perhaps admitting it had been a hard day and being told that 'well, if your kids had Jesus in their heart they wouldn't have this problem'. Their children must never give them problems. Right?

It has been refreshing to hear and be reminded every day to live in daily confession, forgiveness and repentance. I'm not sure where I am going with this except to revisit that pretending we all have it together and never have struggles is SOOOO damaging. I need to hear that Jesus loves and cares for me and that I am forgiven. That is my comfort. I am not proud of my struggles but am comforted by the Gospel. I am also comforted to know that I am not in this alone. There are fellow Christians who also struggle with sin (duh) and they too are forgiven and loved by our Lord.

Cecilia Johanna

Cecilia turned 7 on monday. She was born in weather much like we have been having this year. I barely remember much of anything from that day except when she decided to come she came quickly. The week before she was born our well went out so we were without water and thus without plumbing for about five days. We got water back on Friday, I caught up on laundry on Saturday, and she was born on Sunday. I remember my brother was here helping with the basement project and he asked if having a baby was like going out for pizza for us. Har, har Steve. Not exactly.

She was a cute little peanut from day one. See her charming smile? Anna didn't believe it that she had a sister. She was ten at the time. She came to the hospital with the rest of the crew and held her and started to cry. Pastor Struefert happened to be there when she came in and when she asked "Why am I crying?" Pastor said, "I know why you are crying. I had five sisters before I ever had a brother". We all laughed. Anna took her under her wing from day one as she has with all her brothers as well.

Cecilia has always been very petite and soft and gentle. She has her screamy, meany moments but her enthusiasm for learning and understanding seems to always have been there. She is not always the most neat and tidy as her older sister complains about but her little blond headed face is ever so sweet especially when decked out in her choir robe, carrying her hymnal back from Holy Communion.

Her daddy calls her princhepecca (Not sure how to spell that) which is Italian for princess. She certainly can live up to that title. She will be a princess for a long while I think. Anna I am sure will see to her wardrobe (or grandma) and hopefully she learns to see to her own hair soon as having her sister around to do it won't last too much longer.

She isn't that 6 year old girl anymore and is ever so happy to be 7 now. She has grown up quite a lot this last year. If she isn't reading, she is playing happily with her stuff in her room. She is smart as a whip and of course opinionated. What girl is not opinionated in this family????

Happy 7th birthday Princhepecca!

Rules and questions

So I have been processing, processing my children's ability to let me be their brain. So......we revisit the rules again and this time round I am going to 'try' to remember to ask them questions about what the rules and expectations are instead of saying things like "don't forget to do your chores". or "it is not ok to pitch your shoes wherever you land when you come in the door". It won't solve everything but hopefully they might start processing a little bit on their own......

I am also going to make up a cute little "Rules for Class" sheet for my little darlings to go over every day. Sigh. Sounds like an institution doesn't it?

School went pretty well over all and I would have to say working with the older kids is overall easier. I never could be a kindergarten or 1st thru 3rd grade teacher. Too many wiggles for me. I have enough of that I realize within my own walls but a whole crowd is a challenge. Plus my handwriting is really terrible and wouldn't help the poor dears too much. Good thing LaRena with the beautiful handwriting takes care of that.

Took Erik to the dentist this afternoon and fell asleep in the waiting room. That must have been a sight. Hope I didn't snore or anything.

Stefan seems to have another cold. Being 40 is so nice in that regard. That must be God's design so I have the strength to chase after the little people's noses without worrying about my own.

Back to the dinner prep.......

Not just another Sunday

The highlight of the morning was getting to hear Isaiah Obare speak during Bible class. He is the son of the Bishop of the Lutheran Church in Kenya. He talk was really incredible and humbling. To hear a man who has truly had his life endangered, threatened for the sake of the Gospel and hear him clearly state his desire to continue in ministering in these conditions was certainly an encouragement to me and a testimony of his faith. THe emphasis on getting the true Word of God to the people of Kenya was also striking. I am sure I am not expressing this in any deep or profound way but our life here is so very rich and soft and spoiled. How spoiled we are to have so many men in the seminaries and so many teachers at our disposal. I don't know of any pastors here in the states who are actually in physical danger for standing up for the purity of the Word and the church.

I did note similarities in problems of liberalism vs. conservative practices as well as the theology of prosperity being prevalent and a problem within the church in Kenya. I found that interesting. It was all very interesting. Understatement. I did see a very cute smile and chuckle from LaRena as Isaiah stated they would love to have Pastor Stuckwisch come and teach in Kenya as he has in Russia. We would keep her company. :o)

I thankful we had this opportunity to hear what he had to say. In many ways you would have to be there. Perhaps Pastor Stuckwisch will blog on it and this will all make more sense. Perhaps that should be a tag.

End of the Day

So I got away for a few hours and that was nice. Took care of a lot of little errands that had been bugging me. Wasn't totally successful but hey, it was a little progress. I am actually in the mood to cook this evening. I made this very weird salad for the carry in dinner. I hope it tastes good. It has peas, onions, cheese, celery, sweet pickles, peanuts, hard boiled eggs, mayo, lemon juice, green pepper, pimento......and a few other things. Sounds weird and I hope it tastes good. It was in my "Cooking from Quilt Country" book by Marsha Adams. She used to have a show on PBS but I think has since suffered from cancer and I am not sure she is even living. It is a great book even for the interesting information in it and pictures. We shall see if it gets eaten tomorrow.

I am also attempting Tapioca pudding. It may not work as I don't have small pearl but granulated Tapioca. I am not sure they can be substituted. I am thinking about making some ginger bread. We shall see how the energy holds out.

The little kids have been pretty cute this evening. They got some Wee Sing CD and have been listening very attentively to it. Stefan was dancing around in circles and even as number 7 it still fascinates me how they just pick up on twirling around in circles to music. Pretty cool and pretty cute.

Cleaning was mostly successful. I did notice that the garbage can area still looks a little grungy.....may be tomorrow. Grunge is something to be avoided and put off so I shouldn't be surprised that the child put in charge skirted that job.

Time to go read to little people.

Lots to do

So it Saturday. After church this morning, we are on a mission to sanitize this place. THere are many places which drop through the cracks of the busyness of life so we earmarked a few and are having a cleaning festival. The kids are thrilled as you can imagine. I am hoping to go catch up on a few errands as well.

My dd has calmed down a bit from her giddyness which is good. I hope Paul doesn't pull in the driveway soon. These young people keep me entertained at the least.

I must admit I am a bit in the doldrums but perservere. Nothing a little cleaning, chatting with friends, and forging ahead can't help. Taking care of stuff also drags me down and despite purging as time allows, it still can bug me.

I got the spelling program in the mail yesterday and it's mantra is drill, drill, and drill again. It is scripted which is great. I couldn't do it without that. Now to carve out the time to work on this with said son. It will be a good thing.

Anna

So my dear daughter is more cryptic than I am. I guess that is a trait that must get more pronounced with each generation. I know what she is talking about in her blog and may tell a few select people but.......otherwise don't bother asking. I might burst out laughing. She really is very odd and God Bless the young man who is brave enough to fall for her. She will probably bonk me up side the head for saying that. She really does have many wonderful qualities in all seriousness so this parenting thing can only get more interesting with time.

I am behind looking into colleges for her to visit. I should spend some time today looking online with her at a few possibilities we have considered. She is leaning closer to fiber/textiles again with some accounting on the side. I do still drool over Bach Preludes and Fugues though so I will temper my desire to have a child who can play all of them. She can learn some of them I am sure but perhaps this won't be her field of study. She is a study herself.

It is a snow day if you haven't guessed and I am riding herd on kids doing the subjects they have been neglecting. Hey, perhaps I will get a nap as well.......

Peanut butter seems to be bad too.....

Stefan snitched a bite of my peanut butter toast this morning (great breakfast eh?) and he began to sport a few hives and swell up a little. It wasn't of the variety of this summer but I do think it was the peanut butter. Sigh. I guess I will try it one more time with Benadryl handy to see if this is true. Since everyone and their cousin eats peanut butter around here it will be sort of hard to keep it away from him. Perhaps we will have to discover a new lunch material.

Supposedly we are going to get a lot of snow today. I haven't seen any so far. Thursday morning the driving was the pits and I was ready to go buy a few new tires. My dh seems to think spring will be here soon so he wants to wait till fall. We shall see on that as well. I am admittedly getting a little tired of being cold. It is warm near the stove but can be a little chillier in the further points of the house. Yes, we dress for the weather.

Stefan is also in the habit of getting up in the middle of the night. His new bottle habit has created some problems in the staying dry enough department. He tends to wet throuh in the night. He is not a happy camper to be wet and cold and is REALLY not a happy camper to be stripped naked to remedy the problem. I suppose I should have gone to bed early but we were watching some ridiculous Mr. Bean episode about his trip to the dentist and I can't pass up Mr. Bean too easily. Then we watched the first "Pretender" episode and were amused by Miss Parker's get up and how they changed her character quite a bit as the episodes progress. She seemed a little too athletic for the later Miss Parker. So.......close to 11:00 we hit the hay and now it is 1:30am and here is the Stefan. I think he is ready to be pitched back in bed. The dry bed.......

Two naps a day

That is the way it should be. Stefan thinks so too. So it rained a lot yesterday then turned to snow and bitter cold. Thus art classes were canceled and LaRena and I cheerfully called a snow day as we knew the roads were a mess. So.......we kept the wood stove stuffed and warm, did laundry and I discovered with our new found space that the dear children will escape from their mother leaving her falling asleep on the couch with Stefan. This happened twice! Unbelievable. Perhaps I should pray for more snow. I don't seem to sleep at night too well so this could be another alternative. Stefan enjoyed it too.

So most the laundry is caught up and I just sent hte kids to the kitchen to get it cleaned up. It sure needs some work. Leftovers for dinner is the plan. No new pots and pans to clean.

I need to make contact with my dh sometime but he seems to mysteriously disappear whenever I try his number. What? Is he working or something?

I chickened out

So I went to this meeting last night at church where they are all very excited for me to be in charge of the Used Book Sale to raise funds for the window replacement project. I had sent out an email expressing that I was not sure how I would be able to handle being in charge of it and certainly could use some help if not have someone else take over. I mentioned that as the mother of seven and every other crazy thing that goes on my life that this project might not get done without other bodies involved. Hmmmm.......so they thought Anita could be my helper and I mentioned to them that she was expecting and they all looked sympathetic to the weariness she may be experiencing......and then they asked when she was due. I missed my opportunity. I should have said "I think right after me" but instead I said, "I think sometime in mid-September but I wasn't positive". SO.........I have been appointed delagator (Is that like an alligator?). And in Karin style I delegated to the man who volunteered me to call Anita and ask how she would feel about helping me out. Ha! I am so naughty. He sort of blanched and said "Yah, yah, I could do that". Just wait till the poor things find out I am expecting as well. Perhaps Dave S who reads this blog will let them know quietly on the side. I will very sure to delegate this whole thing out as I am not sure if it will ever happen unless I do. Ramble, ramble......

She'll be shopping at the Hanna store till she's dead

So said my mother after she asked if the doctor's appt. I was going to was because I was pregnant. What was I was going to do? Lie? I was on the other end of the phone listening to my mom having a small freak out as she realized that number eight, God willing, is expected in early September. I tend to wait to reveal such information to anyone really. But, she just happened to call when I needed to scoot out the door and going to the doctor for me must mean to her that I am pregnant. Why else would I be going to the doctor anyway???? In the midst of her little freak out she blurted out "I will be shopping at the Hanna store till I'm dead!". I found that most amusing. The Hanna store is the Hanna Anderson outlet in Michigan City which sells the most beautiful cotton clothing which shops for her beautiful grandchildren. Thanks mom. Smile.

So Charley of course called his mom and she wasn't the least bit surprised by this news. He told her to go ahead and tell his siblings as the last time he sort of forgot to and was harrased a little for not mentioning it. Well......when it is your seventh some things slip your mind.

So keep us in your prayers as the little guy (of course it will be a boy) is cooking along and the mommy continues to deal with the rest of life her in Hornerdom. A few other friends I know have announced such news on their blog. If you don't know how to comment, now is your chance to figure it out.

Ah shopping, my poor mom suffers many hardships........

Interesting day

I would say school went well this morning. The kids were better than I have ever seen them this morning for catechesis. Wow. All kids worked hard on their math and listened to their history attentively. Wow. I do need to spend some time preparing more for history. I feel we bounce from one thing to another and prep time is lacking.

It snowed a lot this afternoon which I do love but it makes for hazardous traveling. The kids all came home and were somewhat productive which was also good.

Weird email but that is ok. Muddle, muddle.

Charley is working hard on plans for the vestment cabinet for church. I am very excited about this. It looks awesome from the drawings and I am sure the pastors won't know what to do with themselves when it is done. I am baffled that the vestments stay up on what they are on currently. I haven't gone and examined it as I have never set foot in the sacristy but I have heard stories.

Have thought to talk to Erik about visiting a different troop before he makes his final decision. He is Scout material if there ever was one. Sigh again.

Tacky posts

So I vent sometimes. I was talking to a friend about how there are some things that I would LOVE to vent about but can't as I am not sure I want everyone to read them. Not major yucky venting or anything but venting that is about some stuff about ME. Venting about misunderstandings is just that, venting. I don't find it that shocking myself but if I blog enough I can at least make that post go further down the list of posts. Sure I could delete it but why? I do feel strongly that friends should talk to one another if there are problems and that is what it means to love each other. I have friends who would chase me down if I didn't talk to them and those are what friends are supposed to be like. So......I suppose I should chase them down who refuse to talk????? That is a good question? Feel free to respond. It is refreshing to have friends who do care though and who would chase me down if need be.

Fighting the housecleaning fight

I have no energy lately to attack the various areas of perpetual clutter, mess, smell, etc......so I wonder how to devise a new plan. A new plan......always a new plan. I suppose not blogging, venting, finding a place to take a nap, being tired of being cold and feeding the wood God, does not help me tackle the mess. I think I should go have a blitz for the next hour and clean this disaster. My poor darlings are tired of getting food for the wood God, going out in the cold to feel animules, facing the dishes and so I guess some sunshine and just goofing off with some friends is in order. There is plotting amongst the boys to get together with friends this weekend. An hour of cleaning won't kill them.

I should go ride herd on the oven fries so they actually get done early enough so we don't have to inhale them as we walk out of the house for church.

Anna and I are discussing all the shocking things we do. I suppose not chasing the dishes 24/7 is shocking. Sigh. We are fine but feeling like social misfits at the same time. Happy boys downstairs being ridiculous. They must be enjoying each other's company or something.

Scouts

My ds Erik is contemplating whether to remain in Scouts. He is so close to Eagle but is not seeing much point to the whole thing. No, it is not because he is academically challenged or anything. Erik really is model material for Eagle so it will be a little struggle and a process for his dear old mom and dad if he in fact drops out. Sigh. I am not sure how much more energy I have to help with such things and he clearly has strong feelings so we will talk it out and see what happens. He is the hardest working, generous with his time, kind young man that I could ever wish him to be. Sure he has his struggles with some things but as far as things in general I couldn't ask for a nicer son. I am proud of him no matter what and hope I can help him reach a conclusion if he is not already set on his decision.

More muddling.......

Two and half hours till Charley gets home.

Resolution to conflict rant

How in the world does one make resolution to conflict without talking about it????? Ignoring a problem/misunderstanding/hurt feelings are never resolved by just glossing over the problems. THat is just the way it is. I personally am famous for saying it like it is and so I suppose I have a reputation for being difficult or surprising or not everyone's favorite person. I do not go around plotting to be 'forthright' but sometimes it just happens. Why do people pretend there is nothing to talk about!!!!!!!! Or......let's see......there is a log in your family member's eye so there must not be any specks in mine???? I never have stated that I don't play a role in misunderstanding and so that is just part of fuel to the misunderstanding! Ugh. If we talk about things then we can understand how the other party is different or has a different perspective on a situation. Ugh, ugh and double ugh. I too attempted pretending and nope, not working. I am not a 'Pretender' (but we do like that show, lavender trench coats and all - Miss Parker is such the feminist - shocking really).

Hmmmmm......so we muddle through another day of being social weirdos, but the pastor said that sometimes we Christians just are perculiar. I believe it is in Matthew that conflict resolution is addressed by....'gasp' Jesus himself. Hmmmmm.......could this be important?????

Rant, rant, rant.......

Lots of stuff

So the State sent us a little rebate on our property taxes. Weird. I am not complaining. Then we got Charley's retirement statement - ugh. Try not to think about the stock market........

Let's see......Matthew has a bombing headache and is in sick bay. Perhaps it is just a headache. Stefan is teething and must have gotten a little cheese with the chicken he snitched from me......cleaned up the mess. He is happy enough though.

Asked about car insurance for Anna and decided our children are never driving. HA! We should get her a permit but she would have to have a pretty good job to pay even part of a 16 year old's insurance. I am not sure how people afford that. We did learn that since boys insurance is even that much more expensive, that they do get a break if they are married. HA! again. The insurance lady was plotting a newspaper article about a lady who gets her boys married off early to help cut the cost of car insurance. We were kidding. She did have a good sense of humor and appreciated my shock at the price and blatent -'Uh, that isn't happening any time soon' comment.

My boys are obsessed with Transformers. I think they need to take up drawing them. That would be cheaper.

Um.......Charley is in Mexico where it is warm and we are home fighting the cold. It was a little better this afternoon but I understand it is getting colder again tomorrow.

Erik told me something very surprising this evening about something he has been thinking about. Nothing earthshattering but none-the-less surprising to me. Stay tuned.....can't tell.

Well, this has been a thrilling post. I must go be responsible once again if I can muster up the strength and energy. Hopefully Stefan is done reacting to his little bit of cheese. Vigilance......

A much younger Benjamin

He isn't smiling but he is ever so cute. He was two years old in this picture and it has always been one of my favorite pictures of the little guy. He is feeling much better today and spent the day playing with army guys and watching his copy of Ratatoulli from Grandma. Happy boy.

He has a new screaming green winter coat as well to keep him warm(er) in this awful shivering cold. I like winter but this is a little too cold for me.

Anna and I went and got some winter 'play' boots for her which are screaming white. All she needs now is a sixties dress and long hair with sunglasses and a spot in an old James Bond movie and she is all set. I don't think these boots will be making too many public appearances but if you want to go sledding with her I am sure will enjoy seeing them. They were a bargain, what can I say.

Benjamin's Bday- because I'm Benjamin

That is his favorite pronouncement. Benjamin turned 5 on Thursday, because he's Benjamin. He is such a smiley cutie pie. He was sick as a dog though and I think he was last year as well. We tried to get his dinner on the table in a timely way so he wouldn't be too tired and he managed to nibble some of his dinner. Charley looked at him and asked him if he would rather wait till another day for his cake and just go to bed and he said yes. Sigh. He was wiped. He did manage to open his gift "I'm Still Here in the Bathtub" by Katz and we read/sang a little bit to him before he trudged off to beddy bye land.

Last night, we got out his cake and sang happy birthday to him again and he was still feeling awful. He could barely blow out his five candles. It was really quite pitiful. Blow! Cough, cough. (Yum, yum). Off he went to bed again.

This morning at 12:30am he got up hallucinating with a high fever. Ugh. I loved him up, drugged him up, prayed with him and tucked him back in bed. He slept till 9:00. His little brother got up at 4:30 am so my plan of having a lot of energy and getting caught up has not been real successful.

Benjamin is much better today so he is back to his perpetual playing mode. Happy child, happier parents. Maybe some sleep tonight. Happy birthday Benjamin!

Six coats later

I guess my motivation to blog has not been real great since the new room is complete. After six coats of finish on the floor, we moved the furniture in and I could just stay in there all day. It is really quite remarkable. All the smaller variety children have decided it is the place to slide and collapse on the floor. I suppose it looks like a gym floor to them and since they are short people that is what they feel needs to be done there.

Our couch purchase of a few years ago moved in the new room. These couches were far larger than we thought they were so they made our old furniture look like hobbit furniture. If you are ever over here and we suggest we sit on the hobbit furniture, it is because of that huge furniture that was in there before. I think we must be hobbits. I feel like one lately. Hybernate, eat yummy food, fall asleep on the huge furniture.......The huge furniture which I suppose should be named something - Ent furniture???? Is that how you spell that? So anyway, life is good in the new room. Sandy was able to cycle through all the kids for piano and I am sure it was a far more pleasant experience than being squished in our old dining room.

I hope to get the rest of the house in order so that it doesn't retain that clutter look. Just moving the furniture around has made a huge difference.

Now......the view out the window is the next project.......come visit when it is dark for right now.

Floor done

The floor looks absolutely wonderful. Perhaps furniture will move in by the weekend. Phew.

Cecilia is in love with hymn 880 so we sang it together tonight. She is so sweet. Then she went through the hymnal with me as I told her how it was laid out by the church year and different categories. She thought that was cool too. She told me all her favorite hymns she could think of, and why she liked them. She said she loved the words too. Sigh.

Now maybe I will get to bed. The kids are all reading or quietly somewhere. Tomorrow is another day.........

Lord Jesus, since You love me,
Now spread Your wings above me
And shield me from alarm
Though Satan would devour me,
Let angel guards sing o'er me;
This child of God shall meet no harm

Sanding done, coat number one on

So I think I am just sick of projects. This particular project will be incredible for our family so I am grateful. The upheaval to the family is more than a little wearing. So.....yay......the sanding is done and the first coat just went on. The hubby is a much happier person. He has had a magical transformation (Hey, he's a transformer!) Cool. The floor is beautiful as well.

I had my fun walk with a friend, my mom fought the fog to bring Martin home, and I went to deliver Marissa's sweater. New babies are ever so sweet. I had a good talk with her mommy and how fun to talk about her children instead of her child. Cool again.

Epiphany service was great this morning. Marissa's mommy wanted to come but thought it was at night. Oops. There were a lot of people in church and it was great to see people home for Christmas. We are finishing off Christmas presents this evening so all and all this has been a full day. Is it time for bed yet?

Fighting alert from downstairs........later.

Still sanding......

It is 10:00 pm and Charley and Erik are still working on the sanding. This is the last round and perhaps in an hour they will be done. Ouch. It has been a long day.

Anna is finishing her 16 gore dress which looks great. I am happy for her. She SO loves that pattern.

I seemed to bump all over today between church, taking Anna to work, getting sanding supplies, taking boys to the movies, taking them home, going to Sandy's so Anna could finish her dress (our zipper feature doesn't work.....). After not sleeping much at all last night I hoping to get some sleep tonight.

Nighty, nighty

My pastor's wife

It is our Asst. Pastor's wife's birthday today. I have been thinking about her this morning. She is such a great example to me of all things sweet and how to look on the bright and loving side of things. Regina is gifted at saying a phrase that is ever so valuable to those around her both in her immediate life and the people who know her. The phrase is "I love you". In relation to the previous post of presumptions etc. it just strikes me that what I would love to hear is not the stress involved of misunderstanding or whatever but just the words 'I love you.' As Regina also so often says 'Sweet!'.

So on the way home from church this morning after much stress over decision making etc and thinking that I must be the most worthless wife and mother, I received a phone call from my husband telling me he loves me and is grateful for the wisdom God has given me to help us make decisions in and around the house for the good. Was he trying to make me wreck? THAT was sweet. There are no sweeter words than to hear that someone loves you. The sweetest words to anyone are of Christ's love for us poor miserable sinners. But to hear from my loved ones that they love me is really very important to me as well. That phrase is ever so hard to say. Regina says it all the time and I appreciate her loving example to those around her. This stress etc is just SO not important and muddling along in Christian love is SO much more productive.

So I love my husband too and told him so. We will need a good strong drink at the end of the day and I look forward to being able to use the room that he is working on for his family. His skill is a great blessing to us and to others. For that I am grateful.

Happy birthday Regina! Hope you have a good one! We love you!

Floor sanding and finishing

So tomorrow morning is the big day. Charley sands and finishes the new floor. He is CLEARLY a little nervous and looking forward to it being OVER with. I am looking forward to it as well. I was thinking about how we have sort of moved as many times as we have redone rooms in this house. Every time we revamp a room everything has to be taken out of it and maybe there is some random container or two from every room that has been done that still lurks in storage land. Charley and I have only moved twice in our marraige but seemingly endless times in rooms. I am not sure where the time comes from to go through all that stuff that doesn't get put back into the rooms. THis room is completely new to us but the garage stuff had to go somewhere. Sigh.

We will have to throw a room warming party or something. This is the year our mortgage finally goes away. Phew. There is another reason to party. The room looks fantastic in my opinion and someone said something to the effect of Charley laying down his life for his family to get this room done. I said he is looking forward to laying down his body tomorrow night and also to not working this hard for awhile. We figured out he hammered around 14,000 nails in with this floor laying hammer thingy. Ouch. He did manage to read a book to the little people tonight and tackle one very messy diaper.

Stay tuned

The Fugitive

I just love that movie. My dh gave a fresh copy to me for Christmas. We wore out the video. I love it because it is not the run of the mill bang up shoot up sort of mystery story but the characters have brains. Perhaps I just enjoy people using their brains. I know this is an old movie but if anyone knows of some fresh movies or old movies that are also brainy I am open to suggestions.

I love how the characters play off of each other in this movie too. They are both sort of beligerant and know what they are after and it takes much of the movie before they start to see eye to eye. The desperation in the doctors eyes to prove he did not kill his wife. Love it.

Maybe I am too much like the Marshall "You are not in prison so I am going to put you there - that is my job". Me: "You did not do your job, go to bed" "Your dog is legally dangerous, keep it away from me" "This is not your business........I am not asking for your input" (Ew that was sort of yucky) He just says it like it is. Maybe I would like some of his other movies. I don't like ALL of Harrison Ford's movies.

So there you have it. That is what we watched New Year's Eve by-the-way.

Presumptions and forthrightness

I have been thinking of how these two words go together. If we presume we understand another person because of what we may or may not do in their situation then we forget that they are different people. If we presume upon any tension experienced that we 'know' what is going on then we may be wrong.

I have been told I am forthright. I think I am forthright because I don't think it is a good idea to guess what is going on. I may forget that a person is VERY stressed or not even know. I just like to ask questions to clear the air so there is no confusion. I also am known to just say it like it is. I can see where a person may even sin against another because they are guessing and not seeking to understand a given situation. I am certain I HAVE done that. Perhaps I am forthright mainly because conflict drives me nuts and knowing what in the world is going on seems so much more productive and supportive to everyone involved.

Of course I may not be forthright with a young person I barely know picking their nose in public, for instance. That is a tension that is best left to the parents or some kid who just says it like it is. I am not into embarrassing people to 'fix' the 'problem'.

The two words go together to me because our presumptions will never go away unless we are forthright. Given the right timing, we can speak to one another in love. This could be heated at first but if another person brings up the conflict is usually because they truly care for the person they are upset with. You don't even have to be upset to talk things through. What is the crime in having a better understanding of where people are at? It gives people a chance to really love each other I think. It may be upsetting at the time but usually things come out better in the end or least that has been my experience.

So.....warning......I usually can tell if there is something wrong and I usually will want to clear it up. My bad I guess but I also have seen things so improve with a little communication. So there! Sticking my tongue out at everyone - I am so naughty.

Mommy rant

So I decided to put a new twist on responsibility or lack there of, around here. I have found I am still their brain so we broke down jobs into weekly and daily jobs. Weekly are to be done on Saturday mornings and daily need to be done before night activities. THe penalty will be not going to Scouts and going to bed early and on church nights it will be plain going to bed as soon as we get home. I am having to break myself of the habit of reminding them. That is hard actually. I am the great reminding machine. I figure if they can get into an automatic mode then there will be less screaming and barking at people around here. Stupid arguements fall into the go to bed early category as well. Stupid fits over who is holding the catechism papers will get you to bed early too. How silly.

On the lighter side the floor is completely laid and Charley is investigating the sander/poly plan. He is trying to please me in trying to keep the color natural but so far is not coming up with a completely satisfying solution. The floor is gorgeous and I am so looking forward to using that room to listen to my children play the piano, read to them and to myself and of course to knit. THere are details to finish and we will keep plugging along with them with a little encouragement from our friends.

I am reaming out my room of random, weird stuff and hope to sleep more peacefully and at least be less injured in the middle of the night for making my way through it. Ugh. The home of every random thing is my room. I have banned my room as a dumping ground. Figure out where it goes kids. We adults are guilty too of randomly placing things wherever because we don't know what to do with stuff. Stuff.....stuff......stuff.......not too much added this year at CHristmas. More books and music then anything else. Some needed clothing was the other item. Phew.

Off to work some more on our room.

New Years Eve

My oldest two are off at the Gelbach's having a grand time. I see from Susan's blog there is a lot of silliness. Shocked I am...... It is pretty quiet here. We are going to church this evening and I doubt I will make it much past then. We have no New Year's tradition other than maybe watching a movie and then falling asleep well before midnight. My parents came today and we had a nice meal and visit. I have cleaned for no one lately as the new room project includes piles of wood, constant influx of dust and that will not end untill perhaps next weekend. I really hope to ring in the new year cleaning my room otherwise know as the path room. It is getting beyond ridiculous. The rest of the house is really not that bad other than dusty. I think it isn't that bad because if anyone can't figure out what to do with something, they put it in our room. Now I get to put all of those ever accumulating things away. There are a few things missing in there which is no great surprise either so I hope to find them.

Had a pretty good talk about parenting last night and I am experimenting with some anti-bark orders ideas or rather ideas I remembered from camp and......they work. It is from the same guy who said every kid has a score card on the every adult as to whether to listen to them. I also remembered while we were talking last night how he emphasized going to the child, getting on their level (that isn't as easy with kids who are taller than you - stools?) and touching them on the shoulder. It works. I am going to 'try' to have them come to me. I am also 'trying' to have everyone repeat the instructions so I know their brains have processed it. It is so easy with this mass of bodies to shout orders from across the room and then go nuts when everyone is talking at once and not many people paying attention to what is needed. No this is not a New Year's resolution but just a reminder to myself that getting their little faces closer to mine when I am giving out instructions is more effective. Can I remember that all the time????? Oh, the other part of the conversation was about training the kids how to help their siblings. Yes......where to begin. I will be rumbling that around in my head as well and perhaps making a list of how tos to go over with them.

A baby's favorite part of Christmas.....

Eating the Christmas ornaments. What fun. I found Stefan pretty cute and amusing as he tried the ornaments out. I wonder what babies think. "Wow, look at that! I wonder if it tastes as good as it looks?" Cutie pie. He has since stopped mauling the tree but at least he didn't get too carried away. Someone once said how you can always tell if there are toddlers in the house by the height of the ornaments. We just tried to put the unbreakables on the bottom which worked for the most part.



Church was great as per usual this morning. Stefan cooperated and fell asleep just as the service began. Sweet. His skin looks better lately and I am sort of assuming it is because he IS taking a bottle and getting less allergens from me.

A young child in the family decided to clean his ear out with a little light sabre this afternoon. He learned the meaning of not sticking anything smaller than your elbow in you ear. Hopefully nothing will happen as a result of this but it did hurt. He seems ok now. What next. Of course we were getting ready to leave the house and were already sort of late when this occurred and.....the child tends to scream about stuff so it was the boy who called wolf. I become dulled to screaming. "Oh? Someone is screaming? I didnt' notice. Is there something wrong dear????" That would be better known as the family who calls wolf. I can remember a certain young lady screaming and this was her habit so when I heard it I pretty much ignored it until her little friend came to inform me that some yellow jackets got a hold of her.

So, that is some of today and the last few days. And many years ago..... Exciting eh?

Christmas 2007

The picture is of a branch that came off a large hemlock in our front yard. Took out the electric....again. That was Sunday morning.

All and all it was a nice Christmas. The services were great as usual. Only one person someplace behind me was jabbering about how long the hymns were (loved them, prayers (awesome), and chanting too much (incredible). It was hard not to say something and I restrained myself (phew). It was great also to see all the other church going, addicted to daily services people who were also there.

We went to my mom and dad's in the afternoon yesterday. Yay, shrimp. The rest of the food was great too. There was some nice herring (thanks mom) and we had a discussion of how to make homemade and that she hasn’t been able to find fresh herring since the A&P went out of business years ago. A friend’s, daughter’s future father-in-law apparently makes his own so I will have to ask him where he gets his herring. My mother is prepared with her mother’s recipe to give it a whirl. My children got me herring for Christmas and so did my parents. How funny.

Mom and I played some hymns together on our horns. That was nice. My dad played the piano with, but I think we were so loud and I am not sure I heard it. It worked though. I played a little for fun. I am getting the itch to play a little more this afternoon.

There is church tonight. Yay! A Divine Service every day of Christmas! What could be better. My kids have great enthusiasm for this. My brother asked why Martin was wearing a suit. I told him because he likes it. He doesn’t feel fully dressed at church without it. He will take off his jacket to acolyte though and he wants to do THAT all the time. He even cried last week when Pastor beat him to it one morning. Opps. He is getting pretty good if I do say so myself. Very handsome young man too I might add. What mom couldn’t be happier to have a 9 year old son who can’t wait to serve at church?

I love every bit of this church season for all the great services. Stefan has become a bottle drinker which amazes me. Charley loves to take him during church now so I can most of the time be in the sanctuary. It is pretty cute. It is Charley and the other moms in the cry room in the back of the church. Sandy commented how odd it was to see me feeding Stefan a bottle. I agree, but I do think he is happier now. That could be my imagination but it seems to be true. He still nurses some during the day and night but not as much as he did. I am truly ok with that. He is growing up and may be one of my younger ones to lose interest in me but that is ok too. Everyone is different and has different needs.

We are living off of leftovers which is also great. The owner of Heavenly Ham gave us a ham and also a breakfast casserole and bacon for Christmas morning. That was incredibly wonderful. I was hoping to find time to make some sort of casserole and then it was handed to me. Wow.

Charley has primed the walls and ceiling of the new room and is working on the top coat. Anna and I went to Lowes this morning and picked out paint. I also inquired of a large rebate we never received and a manager type person looked into and found it was never processed. They actually went ahead and refilled it and we should get it in a few weeks. Oh happy day. It was pretty large so that should make some difference in the renovating fund.

For my dad (but I won't eat it)

O lutefisk, O lutefisk, I put in the dooorvay.I vanted you to ripen up, just like dey do in Svierge.A dog came by and sprinkled you,I hit him vid an army shoe.O Lutefisk--Now I supposeI'll eat you as I hold my nose.O Lutefisk, O Lutefisk, how vell I do remember On Christmas Eve, how ve'd receiveour big treat of December.It vasn't turkey or fried ham It vasn't even spickled spamMy mudder knew dere vas no risk, In serving buttered lutefisk..O lutefisk, O luteffisk--now everyone discovers Dat lutefisk and lefse makes Scandinavians better lovers.Now all da vorld can have a ball---You're better dan dat yeritol.O lutefisk---vid brennevin--You make me feel like young again!

O lutefisk, O lutefisk, when my poor heart stops beating, The gates of heaven will open wide, I'll see the angels eating From steaming platters of the stuff, and there will always be enough, O piece of cod that I adore, O lutefisk forevermore!

Labels

This is what I mean. Labels are just labels. With every decade there are new labels and new ways of describing the same learning challenges. The labels do not solve the problem or lack of skill. The tools to help the child acquire the skill are what is needed. If to learn the skill they need to hear the instruction 10,000 times, then that is what needs to be done. The method of hearing it over and over does not change. Kids who learn this way do not just click. Why am I blogging about this some more? Because I live with that kid and no matter how many times people tell me that he really just reached an age and it clicked, I know that is not true. He finally was given the tools to learn and it worked. Given the correct tools, he went from a kindergarten reading level to a 5th grade reading level in one year. I knew that the same sort of solution must exist for spelling so I called and sure enough was led to the tools that will work. This guy, Mr. Maloney, does know what he is talking about as my child is proof that it works. Seeing the light bulbs pop in his head to having things explained in a way that helped him be able to read and then actually to be able to do it was incredible. If my explanation of how this type of learning does not make sense to you, then I guess perhaps you would have to walk around in my shoes and in my child’s shoes to believe that it is true. I know it is going to take time to get through the spelling program but when that child decides he has had it and is ready to conquer and divide, then I am ready to comply and help him. A willing student means everything.

Perhaps my explanation would still lead you to believe that it was the child's age that was the difference. The difference was really teaching the child the right approach to reading. How do we approach each word as it comes to us while reading. Our 6 year and 12 year old learned extremely quickly but that was because the approach made sense to them. A child who is just reluctant to read but can actually read words is different from a child who simply can not read. This child of mine's spelling approach is the same as how he approached reading. There is no approach whatsoever to his spelling. Put down some sounds and maybe it will work. Spelling is a skill and if the approach that works for most does not work for everyone, then there is a different way to teach it that will work. So why not teach the child the way it will work rather than keep trying to teach the child the way that works for most other children. Hmmmm........

Ramble, ramble.....feel free to ask questions if this does not make sense to you.

Skills

So I had a LONG discussion with Micheal Maloney this morning about one of my children's spelling skills. The discussion of skills itself I thought was pretty interesting and is making me think of how this applies to everything in life. If someone lacks the skills to spell they need to be taught the skill to achieve it. There are people who feel that a certain age has to be reached in order for the ability to be acquired but I DON'T AGREE. If the child can not do the task, such as reading without being taught how to use the tools of reading to be able to read, they are not just going to suddenly wake up and understand. It is an actual skill to be able to understand how to read. The best thing he EVER said to me is that some kids need to hear the rules 10,000 times before they understand and that is true. I have seen it and experienced it. The good news is that skill can be learned and the child can succeed when given the right tools. He also said something I found VERY interesting. For all the labels that are given kids, ADD, ADHD, etc., that these labels do nothing towards teaching them skills. They are treated differently and not always taught in a way that helps them acquire the skills they need. Sure, some kids just click and then they read, but that is NOT true of every kid. My child who had the reading difficulties, would 'learn' the reading skill and understand it that day but would then forget a week later. That was because the skill was not ingrained in him. He understood the skill but couldn't retain it. Then, when given the instruction literally 1000 plus times (or maybe 10,000) he then retained it and hasn't forgotten it. It works.

So.....I was talking to Mr. Maloney about life skills and following directions. Same thing. Ask the child to tell you what is required to do the skill - clean the dishes - step by step to completion. Take the time to teach the skill. Have them repeat it every time for a long time so they retain it. How do you do the laundry.....to completion. This method would apply to all kids. Definitely like catechises. Say it outloud, over, and over...and over. Read it over and over and over. You will own it. You will understand because it is ingrained on your mind and heart. It works.

It was a good talk. I probably have now tortured the rest of my kids with going over the skill of cleaning the kitchen. They know the answers. They told me what needs to be done and if we repeat it orally over and over till they can tackle the task without having it explained then they will own it. They do know what needs to be done. They just need to be walked through it verbally over and over again and perhaps the wicked mommy of the west will go away.

Sigh......back to the kitchen.

Shopping with Benjamin

Benjamin is 4 and I think he is going to try out for the perpetually happy kid award. We have the kids exchange names every year and each kid gets for two of their siblings. Since none of them drive, we should really start this name drawing sooner in the year as it would simplify things for me. Anyway, I don't think Benjamin fully grasped that we were shopping for his siblings as most of the way through the stores his chatter was about how we could get this and that for him. He was truly amazed. Since he has so many older, baby-sitting siblings, he rarely gets out to a store. He talked non-stop the whole time. Of course a four year old also has no concept of cost either so everything looked attractive to him. Why wouldn't it?

We did finally accomplish our task and I was naughty and go Charley something else for Christmas. If he reads this before Christmas he will know but he doesn't usually read it. He reads this Pastor guys blog more than mine but I can't say I blame him as he sort of lives with me so the blog can't be that interesting to him. What he doesn't know is that I do withhold information in order to put it on the blog and let him find out that way. I could put all sorts of interesting information in here and see if he notices.

Back to Benjamin. He has a reputation anyway for being cute and smiley. He told us all about his latest dreams and adventures. He will be a typical male shopper as when we found the second gift in his quest, he was whining to go home. We took an unexpected detour to another store and he was NOT happy. I guess this is why I don't take him to the store very often. I did toddlers in the store enough so these young ones will have to wait awhile to get out of their four walls. I suppose that means, life is church and home. Not a bad life.

Speaking of his life at church, Charley has been taking Stefan a lot on Sundays so I can actually sit through a service. Benjamin has decided this is time for a love-in and was climbing all over me this past Sunday. The people behind me found this quite amusing and were quick to note that Benjamin was delighted that baby was somewhere else. "Mommy, Mommy, kiss, kiss, flop all over her, don't listen, get your leg squished by a kneeler, then wrap your arms around mommy's neck......."


Now I need to feed the Scouts so they have happy tummies.

Procrastinating

I need to finish our Christmas letter and I guess I am stumped. It all sounds sort of oppressive so far so I am going to start over. Ugh. Perhaps it will have to be short and to the point.

It is the beginning of the church marathon which that is totally cool. If you can't find me at home, look for me at church. Perhaps we should change our phone message.

Anna is working all week and part of next so she will probably be rich. We won't know what to do with her. Erik works some as well so the place will be a lot quieter. I should be able to accomplish these tasks set before me but seem to spin my wheels at times.

I did go to the doctor this morning as ordered by my husband, mom, and friends. He wasn't positive what to think but we are trying a few things. Hopefully I will stop sounding like I am losing a lung. Laughing is what really makes it bad. Is that laughitis then?

Stefan is walking all over the place and is feeling pretty good this week. No dairy for that kid. I can't handle the grumpiness of said child so please.....no dairy experiments everyone. Give me the dairy not him.

Blah, blah, blah........

Peace has returned......

The keys were found. Everything is quieted down and the siblings are safe again. Phew. There is a sewing whir coming from the basement and the rest of the kids are watching Andy Griffith. I am looking for some sort of toy I saw at the dentist with no success. I might have to go back there and ask where they got it from.

The boys found a possum down in the coop a little while ago. That may explain the decrease in eggs. It is not just playing dead now. They told us it was a mink so there was a general freak out as a herd of boys and dad rushed back to the coop to take it out. I am relieved it was only a possum.

I love snow

Reasons to love snow......

So, I was asked why I love snow so much if winter itself challenges my happy countenance or just makes my countenance worse. Well, here's the thing. If you have seven very loud children of two loud parents, then it is a great thing to......send them outside to play in the snow. I find that investments in warm outdoor clothing is the best money spent as they stay out there longer. What happens inside then is......peace and quiet. I LOVE IT! I went out to take some pictures a little while ago and wow, I actually wouldn't mind going out to play myself. I think after Stefan goes to sleep tonight I may get on my snow gear and go sledding with the older children. Of course I do have to consider that my back might hurt the next day so it will have to be careful sledding. Perhaps I could make a snow man. I won't name it Parson Brown as those lyrics are VERY weird/disturbing and I am already married.

I do not like friends of mine driving in this snow long distances so that is the down side. Don't forget to call home.......

The kids ARE outside in the snow now so it IS quiet in here. Ahhhhh........my brain feels pretty good right now. I should be watching tv, reading a book, or wasting time dreaming of knitting projects to do. You thought I was going to say, washing dishes, looking for the cabinet keys (they are missing and Anna can't sew until we can find them as her patterns are locked in), or cleaning up clutter or putting away laundry. HA! Snow, quiet, wood burning stove and a cup of hot tea. What could be better? I think I will go find that book.

Fiddlers Hearth

So we went with some friends and my brother and his wife to a local hang out/pub to celebrate Charley's bday late. I've always wanted to go to this place so it seemed no time like the present. It was pretty interesting. It's claim to fame is it live music. There was a band of three guys doing their Irish thing. The deep thoughts I thought were.......why was the one guy sporting a Detroit Symphony t-shirt and playing guitar and lute (not at the same time). And.....what does someone who is Irish look like? Only the guy in the middle sounded like he could be Irish but of course I wouldn't even know if I heard a real accent or not. Sounds good to me. Since the lyrics were all sung with this Irish twang, it was hard to understand them entirely. I did understand most of the birthday songs they terrorized my husband with though. It was a little amusing.

Charley also seems to know everyone in town. Everywhere we go with friends and ourselves for that matter, there is someone who knows him. Then they are smiling at me as if we have a deep connection (Not Charley and I but.....) but I am wondering what they are thinking. I usually feel that we must be old friends with the warm conversations that come up. Whenever I have been pregnant with someone or rather when I am NOT pregnant with someone and this happens it really makes me wonder what they are thinking. "Wow, look at her, those stereo types of women being 'ruined' by having all those kids must have just been ploys to make us stop having them" or......'So, she's the one who lives with him. How does she keep up?' or of course the genuine nice things they may be thinking. I think it is the look of commaraderie where I have no clue who they are and then I have to remind myself when I run into them in the bathroom, why they are staring at me. Charley must be like the president or something. (I never did blog about him for his bday come to think of it).

There was one point where the band asked if there were any sailors in the crowd and my dear husband was briefly tempted to introduce my brother who looked at him cross-eyed and pleaded he not encourage him. My brother sails his boat in his garage so far. He is building a boat. I should find a picture of it and post it. Perhaps there will be a sailing event some time in the next few years as well.

I think I would go back to this place. I definately would check the schedule for who is doing their thing there and perhaps find a dulcimer performance. I have read that the best hammer dulcimer player in the world lives here in South Bend. Since I enjoy playing (but haven't set it up in awhile) I should look up information about him. He has played at this bar and I have no doubt I would HAVE to have reservations. Perhaps in a year or so I can pull that off after remembering to actually spend time looking up the info etc.

It was a nice evening all around and I am glad we did it. Post.

Freaky Fridays

So every Friday morning there is the same scene. The piano teacher comes to our house to teach all the kids from both hsing families their lessons. No running back and forth and we generally lock ourselves in the basement and try to learn something while they are having their lessons upstairs. That really works.

Every Friday morning before she comes, I wake up and glance around and see the clutter everywhere (this seems to happen every morning really) and then I ask the kids to come clean up the living room and dining room so we can keep up our image of not living with clutter. Then.......the kids come into these rooms and look around and see the clutter and perhaps pick up one thing and put it on another surface and start stumbling around some more. Then the mom asks them again and points out some stuff that seems glaringly obvious to her. A child starts to work on clearing a table, for instance, and 10 to 15 minutes go by and for some reason there is still sticky jelly and crumbs everywhere. How can that be? This is the mom question of all time. What could you possibly be doing with this time and still keep going back and forth and yet the crumbs and jelly remain?????? Very, very perplexing. Of course I am sure I was just a precious darling for my dear mother and she never fussed after me about cleaning. (My definition of needing to clean my room, was waiting till some sort of yucky looking spider moved in and then I went nuts cleaning my room. Good thing my mom didn't know that then or she would have started collecting and planting them in my room. It would have been easier).

The last event before piano teacher showed up, was when I walked into the kitchen and saw smoke coming out of the microwave. There was a charred piece of leftover pizza on a melting plactic plate burning up in there. It made a quick exudus to the outside where it smoked for at least 30 more minutes. Now I have to figure out how to get rid of the burning smell in the microwave. It still works. The dog didn't even eat the pizza outside. It still is there of course. Getting kids ready in the morning is far from dull.

The piano teacher may still think our house stays nicely vacuumed until she reads this post......

cookies

The youth group is having a bake sale to raise funds for this summer's Higher Things sale. Cookie baking is not really my thing as details just escape me. It has challenged my oldest three to look through the cook books for great recipes though and to go ahead and try them. We got several different recipes made Thursday and hope to get more done today. Since I have never really got the hang of this, I must say this sale makes more sense to as people will get a variety of cookies with each plate. Perhaps we should always do that.

We also have homemade lit grape vine wreathes for sale but perhaps it is now too late to get any more of these sold. I wish we could find a good place to sell these at outside of Emmaus folks. They are pretty nice actually. We are going to put one on our gate.

My poor husband is really hoping that some of these cookies might stay at our house. His mother and sister have been the royal house of cookie making his whole life (number one reason to visit his mom during Christmas.......) and then he married ME! My talents in this area are SOO LIMITED. I guess I can figure this whole cookie thing out some more but I do remember my Erik looking shocked and perplexed one time when a friend offered him a cookie with frosting on it. He was about two or three at the time and he just sat and stared at it instead of eating it. I sort of rolled my eyes and thought "great, my child doesn't even know what the lady gave him" We had to coax him to try it. "Mom just gives me meat, potatos and veges" thought the little Erik.

I see more and more how I am just NOT DETAIL ORIENTED. Things that require careful attention to special steps just paralize me. We shall see........

Today

I decided to try a new strategy to just survive the day. Stefan has been fussy and crying since Saturday. Today he showed a glimmer of happiness and hunger. He wants to be held all the time which is fine if there were just one or two kids here and no school responsibilities. But....that is not the way it is. I wanted my older children to have a quality school day so I took the kids to the 'other' house for catechesis and then took younger kids and went back to our house to get some sort of math done between taking care of Stefan.

Stefan seemed a little better today but still persists in fussing. It is unfortunately Martin's scout night so Charley is gone for that. I am not sure what to do about church/youth meeting tonight. I suppose if Stefan is totally cranky I will take Charley's car and go home (he is meeting us there after scouts.)

I am making an attempt to use the wood stove to cook with. I made chicken noodle soup on it this afternoon and that worked. Since it is now heating a bigger space, it does not make the house as hot to turn it up to cook with. I should make some pizza in the oven part. Someone else mentioned that and it sounded fantastic to me.

We visited with our friends who are soon to have their miracle baby. We are so very happy for them as mentioned last spring. I could tell that the baby can't come soon enough which is true for everyone in the 9th month. I encouraged to pretend it wasn't going to happen and stay somewhat occupied with other stuff.

Had other weird stuff happen this week so I am proceeding with weathering the storm.

The ice went away. Yay! I am not sure if it is supposed to snow again soon. That would nicer than all that nasty ice. 15 passenger vans and slippery roads do not go together.

We are praying Stefan has an even more cheerful day tomorrow. Sleep....sleep.....must sleep. I never fall asleep on the couch but that happened today.

Blogging my weirdness away

Ice storm this morning. That was interesting. I saw some tail light fragments in the church parking lot but didn't see any evidence of damage to anyone. Perhaps that has been there awhile. It was slow, slippery going on the way home.

We had a new to Emmaus family over for the afternoon and had a grand time. We have a lot in common as far as experience, interests and love of house keeping. Har har. I have no way to judge if that is true but we seemed to have a similar understanding of how house keeping or cleaning is not our first love. I think brain stimulating activity would be our first love.

The kids had fun outside slipping and sliding and only one toddler escaped without a coat for awhile. The family has boys the same age range as most of ours so that was nice for both families. And there are girls close to Anna's age as well. Cool. I am excited.

So.......perhaps I will go feed my family again and clean the dishes some more. Stefan has been the epitome of cranky and seems a little happier now so should try to sneak some oatmeal in him.

Conclusion

I still think I may be weird but my deep conclusion is that about once a month or so I just need some quiet with no one asking me anything or expecting anything. I can usually hold things together for about three or four weeks. That doesn't mean I can't do anything but after working hard doing what I am given to do with a whole bunch of little people and also a dh is working hard too, that sometimes a little rest from expectations is a good thing. I usually don't even realize this is true until I become cranky woo and then my brain goes on over drive and I might figure out why I am cranky woo.

I love my family. I don't mean anyone any harm so perhaps if you picture me in a rubber room when I am cranky woo you might just chuckle and then cut me some slack. Thanks. Hope I haven't frightened anyone.

What I know about Karin

Just for the general publics knowledge (as if you didn't already know this), Karin has an attitude. As I watch my dear friends deal with their kiddos and see in them the same reactions to weirdness and unpredictable behavior, I become more obsessed with just keeping things simple. These same people filter the needs of lots of little people who are at a cognitive level that does not include understanding what will happen if they continue running through the house (again) and their little brother is playing in the pathway. They just seem to not get it. "I am enjoying the running, and so is my friend so what is the problem anyway?" "Mom, why does your hand shake anyway while you are trying to drink your coffee???" This thought actually may never run through their minds until they are maybe 16.

What am I trying to say? I truly think all people filter a lot of other people stuff all the time. I am just not good at it. Containment. I contain a lot for a long time. The kid stuff, the friend stuff of not quite understanding where they are coming from unless they speak clearly (I am usually obviously cryptic). If you are going to be cryptic, then how about just saying what is really on your mind......????? Then there comes a point that I have to tell people that I just can not handle any more conditions of what is happening. If it is time for lunch, eat it. If the kids are getting together with friends, tell me if I need to drive. If you do not like my house keeping, keep it to yourself. If you participate in guessing what crazy Karin is thinking, then call her and invite her for a cup a coffee and ask her to explain herself. But......don't guess what I am thinking. Don't guess what anyone would say or do but direct them to the source. If I call and say I may be late, assume that I have a good reason and not that I have been tied up shopping thrivolously for bon, bons.....they have those at the check out lane and it doesn't take too long to pick them up.

Mom's with children in that lovely 'can't think of anyone else's needs but my own' stage really need patience from others. If their eyes glaze over they could look like that for any number of reasons. Perhaps they are thinking of the melt down that occurred over breakfast when their sibling told them they couldn't eat dad's cereal. Perhaps they are dreaming of those sweet moments of rest before their eyes shut last night. Perhaps they are processing how to keep up with their children's rashes or nose picking habits. The list is endless. These are just real issues that may distract a mom from remembering to smile at you in the grocery or even get out of your way. These are all just silly things, but unless I am truly totally crazy, I do think that people do mutually experience these same things. Yes, yes, we forgive, love our neighbor and go on, but I DO think it is helpful to consider that everyone has all these odditities in life and may just be tired if they look at you oddly or whatever.

My best friends just laugh at these muddle through life things. I never want someone to help change things really but just to listen and perhaps remember to pray for me the next time they see a mother with a hoard of kids putzing through the grocery store. Oh......yes.......also to forgive me for my weirdoness. I am JUST WEIRD. Please forgive me me weirdoness as I forgive those who weirdo against me. I don't need fixed, just forgiven. I do need to rant sometimes and then......forgive me. God help my future daughter-in-laws and sons-in-law. They may have to buy my some Bible beer or wine and permit me to just sit at their tables and chuckle at their current frustrations. Oh, don't forget the herring and stinky cheese. But.....please tell me if some dark chocolate will help you and if you do not like hand made sweaters, tell me upfront to save time and money. I will NOT be offended. If you don't want to have gift exchanges tell me. If you don't like working on projects and would rather just buy new, tell me (us). This Karin person is just painfully honest, tired, and perhaps needs a day to go to the Symphony and listen to some great brass music and not do anything for four hours on a train.

I can't wait for two weeks of daily divine services and maybe putting cots in the basement for my tall boys to catch some winks. THAT is what totally rocks my boat. Sigh. Is it that time yet? Pastors can we do that more often? Would your families mind if we just lived at church. Ok, ok, I will do what I am given to do and yes, I will buy Bible wine for our Higher Things fundraiser (windows, whatever).

My dh would like to communicate with me so I am done ranting.

Above the kitchen cabinets

So this afternoon I braved the dust above the kitchen cabinets. Yikes. I am glad we don't know anyone tall enough to keep tabs on that mess on a regular basis. There must have been at least a quarter of an inch of dust in places. I also determined that it is time for some of my wedding gifts to disappear. Vases seemed to be the theme in 1987. Blankets and afghans were also popular. If you come to visit we could hand one out at the door to everyone and you would be assured to stay warm. Anyway, if anyone needs a vase, let me know. There were also some broken serving dishes that I glued and can't use that must go as well. Why is it so easy to part with these things now?

We have been hunting dust bunnies in the rest of the house as well. Fortunately dinner is already ready. I hope to visit with a friend whose baby is due soon this evening. She could use the distraction I think.

It is cold and snowy and the kids are headed out to sled since they have paid their dues in the cleaning department. I need to update the view from my window.......

Wednesday night service

Church was nice tonight. Sermon was great, hymns were great and Evening Prayer is always great. Charley took Stefan the wild boy and I was able to sit in the pew. Benjamin spent much of the time hung around my neck which I suppose counts as bonding time. I don't get to spend enough time with that boy. Cecilia was sort of reclining in my lap trying to soak up a little of mommy too. So.....I suppose I didn't have Stefan to wrestle with and those next two older ones did their best to have a love in.

Some mysterious person took Cecilia's bulletin after the service as poor Walter came to usher us out. It wasn't Walter's fault. Cecilia melted in a puddle as it was HER bulletin and what happened to it anyway. She cried all the way through the back of the church and out the door. Upon arriving home the dear little child was given clear instruction to get ready for bed in ten minutes or less and prayers had been said. (Gosh I feel evil sometimes). The phone rang while these lovely instructions were given so hopefully I didn't sound too evil to the person on the other end of the line. When I return home from church in the evening I am definitely focused on the task at hand - "Get thee ready for bed and get there".

Stefan is nearly in bed so that is a good thing. Perhaps I will work on finishing the knitting project I am working on. I talked to a friend about how the Christmas letter isn't done, and then there are all the books we would love to read. Sigh.

Nighty, nighty.

This is what got my brain cooking

The list below from Anita's blog got me thinking about this misunderstanding thing. Or should we call it something else. I do think Charley and I have been guilty of overanalyzing other people's choices in the past. That may seem shocking but I guess I do still love and quote Barb K. about how each couple has their own definition of life and family that is different from everyone else and that is OK! It didn't go exactly like that but that was the basic gist.

So.....I sent this list to some friends and even some friends who may have made some of these generalizations and one friend had the most profound reaction. She was not defensive or shocked by what people said really but she said "Wow, that list made me so sad that we can all be so thoughtless and mean." Well, I was surprised in a way by her reaction but thought that this list could be made about just any topic related to personal choices.

Why don't we ask questions of each other that show true curiousity, interest and love for one another? Do we HAVE to 'fix' other people's choices. Are these choices really all that bad in light of the fact that duh (Swedish for duh) we are all full of sin? Or that we are all created beautifully and uniquely for a REASON? Do we have to fix what God created? Why not love people for who they are, respect them as being adults muddling through just like the rest of us and just enjoy our different weirdnesses. Cheif of weirdos though I be........

If you have not read the list, enjoy. I found it humorous for the many reasons including many that have been stated to me. In fact, I think most of them have been stated at one point or another either to me or through other people who may have been to chicken to 'fix' us in person.

One last thought.......I have been told I am forthright about stuff. I can't stand not being forthright as the question that something seems wrong can keep lurking in the back of my mind and simply drive me crazy. If you act like perhaps I have offended you, then why don't you talk to ME about it????? If I melt in a puddle oh well? At least the air will be cleared or maybe you may be surprised that I won't melt and I would REALLY like to talk through stuff and not be guessing what the other person is thinking. Isn't it better to be honest with each other thus loving the other person with true care. Another person's weird actions can certainly leave the person receiving the weirdness to go nuts quite frankly. JUST STATE YOUR CONCERNS FORTHRIGHTLY AND THUS SPARE YOURSELF YEARS OF AGONY WONDERING WHAT IS GOING ON!!!!! Ok, I am done now........

The Bitter Homeschooler’s Wish List
From Secular Homeschooling Magazine, Issue 1
1 Please stop asking us if it’s legal. If it is — and it is — it’s insulting to imply that we’re criminals. And if we were criminals, would we admit it?
2 Learn what the words “socialize” and “socialization” mean, and use the one you really mean instead of mixing them up the way you do now. Socializing means hanging out with other people for fun. Socialization means having acquired the skills necessary to do so successfully and pleasantly. If you’re talking to me and my kids, that means that we do in fact go outside now and then to visit the other human beings on the planet, and you can safely assume that we’ve got a decent grasp of both concepts.
3 Quit interrupting my kid at her dance lesson, scout meeting, choir practice, baseball game, art class, field trip, park day, music class, 4H club, or soccer lesson to ask her if as a homeschooler she ever gets to socialize.
4 Don’t assume that every homeschooler you meet is homeschooling for the same reasons and in the same way as that one homeschooler you know.
5 If that homeschooler you know is actually someone you saw on TV, either on the news or on a “reality” show, the above goes double.
6 Please stop telling us horror stories about the homeschoolers you know, know of, or think you might know who ruined their lives by homeschooling. You’re probably the same little bluebird of happiness whose hobby is running up to pregnant women and inducing premature labor by telling them every ghastly birth story you’ve ever heard. We all hate you, so please go away.
7 We don’t look horrified and start quizzing your kids when we hear they’re in public school. Please stop drilling our children like potential oil fields to see if we’re doing what you consider an adequate job of homeschooling.
8 Stop assuming all homeschoolers are religious.
9 Stop assuming that if we’re religious, we must be homeschooling for religious reasons.
10 We didn’t go through all the reading, learning, thinking, weighing of options, experimenting, and worrying that goes into homeschooling just to annoy you. Really. This was a deeply personal decision, tailored to the specifics of our family. Stop taking the bare fact of our being homeschoolers as either an affront or a judgment about your own educational decisions.
11 Please stop questioning my competency and demanding to see my credentials. I didn’t have to complete a course in catering to successfully cook dinner for my family; I don’t need a degree in teaching to educate my children. If spending at least twelve years in the kind of chew-it-up-and-spit-it-out educational facility we call public school left me with so little information in my memory banks that I can’t teach the basics of an elementary education to my nearest and dearest, maybe there’s a reason I’m so reluctant to send my child to school.
12 If my kid’s only six and you ask me with a straight face how I can possibly teach him what he’d learn in school, please understand that you’re calling me an idiot. Don’t act shocked if I decide to respond in kind.
13 Stop assuming that because the word “home” is right there in “homeschool,” we never leave the house. We’re the ones who go to the amusement parks, museums, and zoos in the middle of the week and in the off-season and laugh at you because you have to go on weekends and holidays when it’s crowded and icky.
14 Stop assuming that because the word “school” is right there in homeschool, we must sit around at a desk for six or eight hours every day, just like your kid does. Even if we’re into the “school” side of education — and many of us prefer a more organic approach — we can burn through a lot of material a lot more efficiently, because we don’t have to gear our lessons to the lowest common denominator.
15 Stop asking, “But what about the Prom?” Even if the idea that my kid might not be able to indulge in a night of over-hyped, over-priced revelry was enough to break my heart, plenty of kids who do go to school don’t get to go to the Prom. For all you know, I’m one of them. I might still be bitter about it. So go be shallow somewhere else.
16 Don’t ask my kid if she wouldn’t rather go to school unless you don’t mind if I ask your kid if he wouldn’t rather stay home and get some sleep now and then.
17 Stop saying, “Oh, I could never homeschool!” Even if you think it’s some kind of compliment, it sounds more like you’re horrified. One of these days, I won’t bother disagreeing with you any more.
18 If you can remember anything from chemistry or calculus class, you’re allowed to ask how we’ll teach these subjects to our kids. If you can’t, thank you for the reassurance that we couldn’t possibly do a worse job than your teachers did, and might even do a better one.
19 Stop asking about how hard it must be to be my child’s teacher as well as her parent. I don’t see much difference between bossing my kid around academically and bossing him around the way I do about everything else.
20 Stop saying that my kid is shy, outgoing, aggressive, anxious, quiet, boisterous, argumentative, pouty, fidgety, chatty, whiny, or loud because he’s homeschooled. It’s not fair that all the kids who go to school can be as annoying as they want to without being branded as representative of anything but childhood.
21 Quit assuming that my kid must be some kind of prodigy because she’s homeschooled.
22 Quit assuming that I must be some kind of prodigy because I homeschool my kids.
23 Quit assuming that I must be some kind of saint because I homeschool my kids.
24 Stop talking about all the great childhood memories my kids won’t get because they don’t go to school, unless you want me to start asking about all the not-so-great childhood memories you have because you went to school.
25 Here’s a thought: If you can’t say something nice about homeschooling, shut up!

Responsibilities

So I sort of ranted at the kids this morning about how I might need to have gray clothes to remind me to use my brain or......all of their clothes need to be gray to remind them to use theirs (gray matter). Ok, this may sound harsh but.......why do I have to explain that if I don't want you to take a shower since I don't want you to get your hair wet that you shouldn't get your hair wet in the bathtub either? I seem to need to spell out everything. I suppose I am sometimes confusing. I say something that seems glaringly obvious - "We need to leave soon, so please do not read right now" and then.......the child is examining some random pile of legos on the ground. Parenting is fun.



So what is our responsibility anyway. If our children take piano lessons, is it my responsibility to pass along a reminder to practice? Is it a balance I guess. If you are 6 and you don't realize that time passes quickly, then I as her parent, may need to remind her to practice and make sure it is done.



If you are fifteen and you have been told for years to brush your teeth, is it MY fault if the fifteen year old forgets? No. If you are 12 and have homework and can't seem to get it done, is it my fault that I did not rip the book out of your hand that you are addicted to and send you to a table to do it?



I do find adult relationships interesting in this regard as well. I am truly amazed how mixed up conversation can get. I think that the movie "Pride and Predjudice" should be watched on a regular basis. (Yep, you should read it too, but I don't have time). My kids and I watch this and roll in laughter at how sad it is and ridiculous the relationships in that movie become. Anna and I have even looked at each other with that knowing P & P look when things go awry in real life. Sigh. Misunderstanding go away. Critical thinking where are you? Are things really that bad???? Please Karin, do NOT get your feelings hurt over NOTHING! Stick to the FACTS and do try not to manipulate life or ruminate too long over stuff that is PROBABLY NOT TRUE. But......we all seem to do this. So do my kids. Reflect, reflect, reflect.