Friday, August 20, 2010

Haven't blogged in awhile

I figure I better write something to make the Cecilia's bday post go away. It has been attracting visitors who seem perhaps odd. Since February we have added another little guy to our family. Evan Jakob Sebastian was born July 16 and is currently charming us and growing. Everyone else in the family has been enjoying him. Besides his arrival, I have played in the ND band, biked several hundred miles in the winter (love that actually), took a trip with the kids, enjoyed Anna being home, and a bunch of other stuff. Exciting times with me!

We are now preparing for Anna to return to school and I am attempting to get my ducks in a row here for school. It will be the year of English as the emphasis - spelling, vocab, grammar, writing. Hopefully we can get bunches done. Erik is hoping to take a class at a local college as well.

There..........I have a new post. Ingrid's bday is coming up next week! 2 years old!

8 comments:

John said...

I´m pretty sure you are the Karin Horner who taught at Christ the King School about 20 years ago. You probably don´t remember me but my name is Heather Weiand.
For years I had good memories of you because you seemed to be the only person there of any kind of intelligence. But it was this intelligence that should have made it obvious to you that I was being abused at home. I remember once you even wrote on my journal "Heather is everything ok with you"? and I didn´t say anything because I never did and you didn´t pursue it either. Do you think its normal for a young child to never talk at school? Or to let the other kids run over her the way I did?
I can´t blame the others for not spotting it because people like Lisa Tym and Ria Dargis are obviously not very bright.
Remember how you used to tutor me for something some mornings in order for me to get into the advanced class since you thought I belonged there? Remember how I had to come there before school even started and remember how every morning Ria Dargis would yell at me because I wasn´t supposed to be the building? And every single day you´d say "Oh sorry Heather..I´m always getting you in trouble". Well exactly! Do you think I enjoyed being yelled at by that woman every morning? She was a total bitch! And I was already scared of everything. Would it have been so difficult for you to say "Hey Ria, I tutor her in the mornings. Its my responsibility. Don´t yell at her". No, it wouldn´t have.
I just think its sad that someone who is so overly religious couldn´t extend her "Christian charity" to a child who needed her. You were the only one who was intelligent and compassionate enough to have stepped in and stopped what was going on. Thanks for nothing.

Bikermom said...

Heather. I am truly sorry. I honestly don't remember any of this but your description helps me to sort of remember some of these things you are referring to. Yes, that was 20 plus years ago. I can not go back and change what happened Heather but I am sincerely sorry for dropping the ball. I was 20 years old at the time and in light of other things that happened there, I know I lacked the training to know what to do to help or even to recognize what was happening with you. This of course is wrong too Heather but it was the case at the time. Intelligence does not always mean that a person knows what to do. The fact is I sin against people every day as we are all sinful people and can not fix the wrong we do against each other. Christ forgiveness covers it all. He loves you Heather. I know how pain can prevent you from recognizing that and truly *hearing* that and Christ knows it too. He DOES love you and forgives you all your sins and mine. He prays for you. He hurts when you hurt which clearly you do. I wish I could change the past for you Heather but I can't go back and make it right. I am sorry. I truly am. I will keep you in my prayers Heather and I also pray you are able to or are getting the help you need to heal some of the hurt you have experienced. In this life we will never completely be able to get past the hurts of our past. Christ is for you even if people you know have failed you. Christ heals all our hurt ultimately. My own 'intelligence' as you say can not truly grasp this myself but I know it is true. I will keep you in prayer Heather. I am sorry.

Bikermom said...

I should have said we can not take BACK the wrongs we have committed to each other but we know we are forgiven in Christ and learn from these sins and repent of them. I won't belabor it Heather......sorry.

Heather said...

Hello again,

I just wanted to say that obviously I don't blame you entirely for the things that happened to me when I was a child. That would be silly because you were just a teacher.
The difficult thing for me is that not one teacher over all my years at school and all the different schools ever tried to help me. You came the closest but that wasn't very much for the trouble I was in. My mother verbally and physically abused me for years. My brother sexually abused me. I think the kids at school picked up on the fact that I was an easy target because they didn't waste any time making me into their verbal punching bag. I've had a difficult and lonely life.
I live in Sweden now..its much better than how it would have been if I had lived in America..but I am completely alone here with my husband and our autistic son. Obviously I've cut off all contact with my family. The other difficult part of that is most people don't want to know you if you don't have a family..I guess it scares them.
I just read today what you wrote back in September..and the funny part about that is about 2 months ago I started accepting Jesus into my life. I like to think it was because someone was praying about that for me. Just last week we started going to church here and its helped but I've just started to think of myself as a Christian so its still early days. I guess I am afraid of losing this too..since so much that I have believed in in the past has turned out to be false. Plus its been hard for me to accept any religion for years since my experience at religious type places such as Christ the King were such a nightmare. But I'm working on it..I get a lot of comfort from the Bible and religious readings these days. Hope to hear something back from you..sorry for being harsh but hopefully you understand how much anger I've had about my past.

Heather

Bikermom said...

Hi Heather,it is me. I have a new blog and don't visit here too often. Thanks for writing back. I am not in the least put off by anything you have said. I do understand the anger you have experienced. God bless you.

Sweden is one of my favorite places. I have many relatives there. I do hope you can have a good life there and can make some solid good friends as well. I also hope you find a solid church too where you can find support. Sweden is such a beautiful place. I dream of just being able to go back and see it again but am not sure how soon that will happen. I've only been there twice.

Anyway.....look up my new blog with this post. You could also look me up on facebook if you would like and catch up a bit. I could write you privately that way too. Martinson is my maiden name on there.

Hope to hear from you soon.

brianm245 said...

Heather. This is your cousin Brian from new jersey. I too have a son with Autism. Please don't ever feel completely alone in the world. I found this by googling everyone's name. If you ever want to reconnect I'm at brianm245@ymail.com. I'm sorry that things were so bad for you. I was so young when I visited there...meeting you was one of my best memories of that.

BrianM245 said...

Heather - I just got your message through facebook!!! But it won't let me respond. I know you saw this here so I hope you see it here again.

I must have deleted your email if I didn't recognize the address. I'm so sorry. I did not see it.

My email address is brianm245@ymail.com and I'm just going to put my cell phone number out here, txt me or call me :) 732 841 7964

Brian

brianm245 said...

Hey heather. It's Brian again. Your email address is bouncing back. I can't reach u!