On our anniversary I unearthed the letters that I wrote to Charley while he was working here in South Bend and I was finishing up at Valpo. Wow. That was weird. I thought his letters were in there too but apparently not. I have not dug all the way through the pile and there are so many of them we only read six or seven. The common summer theme was my concern for my tan. Now I just get a tan by existing. I also detect that we should have gotten married sooner. What was THAT all about. True I would have lost my free tuition but what a love sick creature. I do hope that I will support my children if they find themselves in a similar situation and hope I will not have them playing a waiting game for the sake of what people do nowadays. Sure these letters also drip with how young I was but despite being a love sick couple and being somewhat young for marraige by today's standards, I know we could have handled it. I do recall a lot of opinion by the family, which I know they meant well and followed the norms of the day, but I also recall much discussion between Charley and I of eloping. I love the quote of a pastor friend of mine "parents seem more comfortable that their children fornicate and wait to get married rather than their kids getting married so they don't fornicate." (or something like that). We may have 'made it to the wedding day' but in retrospect that extra stress seemed a more than a bit ridiculous. My drippy letters which will remain for Charley and my eyes only till we're dead attest to all of this. (No I didn't write smutty letters) It is the sentiment of the letters that make it obvious to me that playing the proper waiting to get married till you graduate routine foolish in retrospect.
Can't change that for the two of us now but I can certainly think about it for the future with my kiddos.