Helping other people deal with challenges sure can be a challenge. If they don't tell you they are struggling you can't tell that they are struggling. If you don't know what they need to feel better it is hard to know what to do for them. Then.....if you care for a whole bunch of other people it doesn't even occur to you to think about someone needing help if you don't receive signals and are busy caring for the needs of the rest of the crowd. So......needless to say, helping dh get ready for his outpatient surgery has been a learning experience. When I have a baby I have nine months to prepare and mentally process not knowing when the baby is going to be born. Dh knew his date but didn't process much that the rest of us were aware of. I have never thought much about what other people think about as the few people close to me who have any difficulty seemed to 'handle' it or were in such need that there wasn't time to process. I think I have discovered that I am not a mind reader. I can take care of people but am not good at considering other's feelings if they are not the type who processes outloud.
Well, Stefan and I are off to the hospital to see how things are and bring 'da dad' home. It is a good thing my friends care enough to stick with me through my overprocessing tendancies.